When on the chilly dawn of 29th July, 2017, I found myself stranded at the gate of Blue Sharks club, a little tipsy, with aching joints and swollen sleepy eyes, the feeling of contentment gushed my soul. Finally, ‘one wild carefree night’ was in the bucket of my experience. The previous evening, Friday, my friend Felix did not have to waste his breath convincing me to accompany him to a rave night. It was the chance my then conservative self had been waiting for. It never occurred to me that apart from Felix and his girl, Sheila, all others were strangers. The party was crazy, with loud reggae and dancehall music and lots of ladies in booty shorts.

This morning I read the thirty-day blogging challenge prompt; something I am currently worrying about, and my mind flashed the events of that Friday night. It was the night I experimented with the extremes of my character. In the very moment we entered the club, I went straight to the bar. Not with the excitement to try alcohol, I never intended to drink that night. I had figured that since it was my first time in a club, I should neither appear naive nor cocky. The bar counter presented just the right spot, to be present and distant. Nodding my head and tapping my feet at the rhythm of the booming music, I watched the unfolding. I felt happy.

That was my only plan for the night. Until Sheila joined me at the bar counter. When she ordered two glasses of Jameson, I gave her a ‘good choice’ smile. Definitely, the other glass would be for Felix. But instead, she pulled a counter stool next to mine and heaved herself on top. The helm of her miniskirt retreated way past her mid-thigh. My blood warmed. Amidst the chitchats heavy with flirtation that ensued, I could not resist her offer of the other glass. She pulled me towards the dance floor. I half-heartedly attempted to pull back. She was prettier, and I really wanted to dance with her; shake our bodies with vigor to the beats, and when the tempo slowed, hold her in my arms.

The dance led to regrettable actions afterwards, actions from which my friendship with Felix have never fully recovered from. Perhaps it was the alcohol. In the light of the giant steps I have made in the journey of self-discovery, the night of 28th July, 2017 does not only hold the memories of my several firsts, but is also the beginning point of my contemplation on the issues of logics and emotion. What drives the human actions? Logic? Emotion? And what ought to drive the human actions? These matters have stayed close to my faculties, and yet they are still elusive. Sometimes I have grasp on the right reasoning, sometimes I don’t. I think of them most of the times, and currently they occupy my mind the most.

In between logics and emotions, which I am convinced are not two factors pulling in opposite directions, there exist a third; instinct. Instinct is the innate sense in us. Like the need to protect ourselves from harm and the need for air. These are basic activities ingrained in our subconscious for our survival, and they are not impervious of our conscious. You can consciously decide to hold your breath, beyond the point of desperation for oxygen. This supports the idea that human beings have free will. If one argues for instinct, but fails to show that our conscious can control our innate nature, then he or she ought to reject the idea of human free will. I point at the interaction of our faculty of reason with our instinct, behavior, since it is consequently clear that emotions are attached to our behavior. Or rather, our behavior to our emotions.

The necessary, and only conclusion, therefore, is that logics ought to rule over emotions. The mind ought to be the master of the heart. Unfortunately, this is not the gospel us millennials are ready to receive. Everywhere we turn, the message screams; follow your heart. Everyone we listen to insists; the heart wants what it wants. We have indoctrinated ourselves with the notion that what we feel, what we want, what we desire, are all that matter, to the extent that we have forgotten the immense power of our reasoning faculty. It is this power, that sets us apart from beasts. For a wholesome living, I have determined that the mind and the heart ought to be in harmony; the mind giving commands, and the heart moderating the commands.

I am worried that our generation will never invite logics back to the table.


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